


You’ve hecked up a perfectly good character is what you did. Look at it. It’s got anxiety.

by captainThotiana



Category: Star Trek: Discovery
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety Attacks, Ash Tyler needs a hug, Light Angst, M/M, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-16
Updated: 2019-04-16
Packaged: 2020-01-14 20:57:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 602
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18484213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainThotiana/pseuds/captainThotiana
Summary: 4 AM sparring sessions and too many feels. I’d say shipping if you squint but there’s no one in this fandom who doesn’t ship it, so.TRIGGER WARNING! MILD ANXIETY/PANIC ATTACKS. Stay safe, darlings.





	You’ve hecked up a perfectly good character is what you did. Look at it. It’s got anxiety.

**Author's Note:**

> First fic! Woo! I’m torn between this ship and a few others, but eh, I don’t have to choose. Pre-slash kinda, I would say ship it if you squint but like if you don’t ship it why are you here. I’ll definitely be writing more of this relationship.
> 
> TRIGGER WARNING! MILD ANXIETY/PANIC ATTACKS. Stay safe, darlings!

“Come on, get over here. Doctor’s orders.”

“Because you’re known for listening to your CMO and all.”

Pike gave Ash an exasperated look and waved him over to the sparring mat.

“Captain, it’s four in the morning.”

“Precisely, no one here to see you getting your ass kicked.”

Ash raised an eyebrow and started circling around his captain on the mat, looking quite much like a python about to go in for the kill.

Pike, on the other hand, was more in tune with a wolf, calm and cool, nothing visible in his face but his concentration, completely unbothered about everything.

“Are you going to hit me or just get yourself dizzy?”

“It’s all about the element of surprise, Captain.”

In truth, Ash had been dreading this since Pike suggested it. Being pinned to the ground was exactly the kind of thing he didn’t want to do at four in the morning with his captain, but life happens.

Pike was the one to strike first, finally losing patience. Ash ducked under his swing, delivering two quick hits to his stomach, and backed away again.

“You said something about kicking my ass, Captain?”

Pike gave Ash another one of his weary captain looks, grabbed him by the arm when he took a swing at him, and flipped him onto the mat, landing neatly on top of him and pinning him down with a triumphant expression.

Ash didn’t notice though, between the sensation of being choked and his racing heartbeat, struggling to catch his breath.

“Tyler?”

It sounded like there was a voice somewhere, trying to drag him away from the memories of L’rell holding him down, of Voq, of his own hands around Michael’s throat-

“Ash!”

He came back to himself with a start, his captain still sitting on top of him, but no longer holding him down, instead trying to shake him back to the present.

“Hey,” he said weakly, pathetically.

“Hey,” Pike replied softly, wiping a tear Ash didn’t realize was there from his face, hand coming down to rest on his cheek, grounding him. “You were somewhere else for a minute there.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

Pike sat back so Ash could sit up, hands lingering on his shoulders.

Ash was quite suddenly reminded of Lorca, of a similar situation but one with less emotion and more making out on the mat - before he realized that Lorca had been using him, and everything they had was just a game.

He returned to the present with the feeling of Pike’s hands on his face again, gently cupping his cheeks, eyes full of concern instead of desire.

Pike didn’t want anything from him. He wasn’t Lorca, Ash reminded himself.

“You want to talk about it?”

“Not yet, Captain,” Ash said quietly into Pike’s shirt, resting his head against his chest for a few moments.

“Okay.”

There it was again, the affirmation that Pike was not Lorca, wasn’t anything like him. It was hard, not just in the situations with obvious parallels, but in everyday things, in seeing his captain in the same chair, seeing a genius come up with a plan.

“Call me Chris.”

“Okay.”

They sat there like that until it was almost 0500 hours, and eventually got up to get ready for alpha shift.

“Ash,” Chris said as he walked him to his quarters, “when you want to talk- if you ever want to talk, I’m here.”

Ash almost couldn’t resist the urge to pull his captain into a bone-crushing hug in the hallway, where any of the crew could walk by. Instead, he settled on a soft smile.

“Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> So that was that! Short because I wrote it while tired and almost falling asleep after searching for (and not finding) some wholesome Piler to lull me to sleep. Feel free to praise/roast me in the comments.


End file.
